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This week I started work at a new job.  It is in San jose, CA (The heart of silicon valley), I used to be working in Fremont,CA just next door.  Anyway, on my first day I was obviously stressed, I mean starting work not knowing what to expect.  The place also felt very different.  I used to work in a small company and this was a larger company.

I felt many odd things on the first day, but I kind of categorized them under stress at first.  I got back home and started meditating, and I could sense that that feeling from work was now inside of me.  During meditation I tried to let it go, but it was very difficult.

In the following days it became increasingly obvious that what I was feeling was not just “stress” it was the vibration/frequency of the place. It had so many things mixed in it:

It felt lifeless, kind of like a robot.  I could feel this pressure on my heart Chakra, and there was this uncomfortable feeling/frequency associated with it.  This frequency affected my thought, the tension in me, how I related to others.  I had been somewhat reprogrammed.  The saving grace was that I was somewhat aware paying attention.  As I got in my desk to work I would feel this immense tiredness. I knew this was not me.  It was being emanated from somewhere. It was like there was a weight of something putting us to sleep.

This odd feeling was not just in the office, as I visited other parts of the city I became aware of it. The parks felt dead compared to other parks.  There was this feeling of upstate winter yet the sun was there and this other weird stuff, sorry I can’t describe better.

The interesting thing is I had been there before and I had not noticed it as clearly.  I could not decipher it.   Its almost like I needed to being a certain state for those frequencies/feeling to be able to affect me.  This made me thing of Eric statement, you are affected by the matrix only in so much as YOU hold on to it.

IT WAS MY I’s WHICH MADE ME SUSCEPTIBLE.

I needed a particular eye to do a good job at work yet, it held onto certain stuff.  Or it is more like I was not fluidic.  The feeling was felt and my entire body reacted as programmed.

Throughout the week I was slowly working on making myself less vulnerable.  I was also aware as I become more resilient to those frequencies the world around me will change.  So, did meditations, but it was extremely difficult to get rid of that feeling.  I  would get certain parts and other would remain.

The most effective  technique was HighGuard.  The more I think about i, it makes perfect sense.  We are continually under psychic attack from the DO.  It is bombarding us with frequencies that have viruses embedded in it.  That feeling I felt and still partially feel is a virus because I feel like it replicates.  It closes the heart, and makes you into a being know maintaining and projecting that vibration.  They are many such vibrations some are viruses some are not.

Anyway back to HighGuard, I did a High Guard session and it was most effective at removing the feeling.  It is like in HighGuard it take ownership of what vibration is allowed to reside in me, I create it from the smallest strand of light inside me and slowly have it grow to push all else out. (The next statement is more for me than for anyone else) TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR VIBRATION.  YOU ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER ATTACK BY THE DO.

The afterthought of this is, I noticed the vibration at work because it was so foreign.  I noticed its programming also because it was so foreign.  What else is there in me.  What other programming.

I also realized that once you can clearly see the frequency affecting you.  You can affect it, and you have a choice in whether you let it affect you.

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I was talking with my HBI (Higher Balance Insitute) coach, about trying to awaken.  Awaken to the truth to reality.  I always saw spirituality and or many of the out of the ordinary experiences as imaginary or flirting with an imaginary world.  The main reason is because there is no one there to confirm the validity of MY experience.  I needed and SADLY I still need the Do (the matrix) to confirm and approve the experience.  I have recently come to realize I rend to feel crazy or scared because I am scared of losing touch with reality.

The truth is I am starting to finally see reality.  I feel like we are all here so scared of losing touch with reality, the Irony is we all have.  The scary part is without the calming re-affirming outside source confirming my experience the fear will persist.  It is like Yoko Ono or maybe it was Lennon said, when you experience something alone it is a dream; when you experience it with someone else it is reality.  I guess there may be greater truth in that since it is by more than ones consciousness interacting that we create this reality.

So, I guess the fear is just a lack of courage.  A lack of courage to re-learn reality.  Its like we become kids again. Unlearning and re-learning.

I awakened once in college.  I was scared shit-less.  I actually actively tried to go back to “sleep”.  I did not understand it, it was odd I thought I was on some never ending trip and I was scared.  I guess the lie was more comfortable, at that time.  Plus, I did not trust my experience, i trusted the common experience.  Thats one reason why I am grateful for HBI and other “true”s spiritual communities.  I don’t need to be that courageous.